November 17, 2010

  • Rant

    I'm not getting any younger. I may still look like I'm 16, but I'm not 16. As age starts to creep up on me I begin to feel a slowly rising sense of anxiousness.

    I know I'm not the only one feeling it. Some of my friends have voiced the same opinions. The older the get the more single you feel. If you've failed at relationships time and time again, you begin to think to yourself, "Is there something wrong with me?"

    If you really think about it, only one of your relationships will succeed. That is, only one of your relationships will end up in marriage.

    Many people will say that I'm still too young to think about marriage, but I'm not. Collectively, at this age, we're not too young to be thinking about it. Rather than thinking about it too early, many people procrastinate until it's too late. Then they rush into marriage because the anxiety level that comes with age is too high.

    Then half of them get divorced.

    It's not like I want to get married now. I'm just thinking about it, and along with those thoughts come the questions.

    "Why haven't I been able to sustain a successful relationship?"

    "Why am I still single?"

    Which both lead to the big question:

    "Is there something wrong with me?"

    I was talking to one of my best friends recently, and he told me this.

    "I think maybe I'm just meant to be alone."

    So I began to think, maybe I'm just the same way. We're pretty similar. We both like to talk to girls. We both have dated a few girls. And we both have had a few serious girlfriends.

    Yet, they've all failed.

    Maybe I'm meant to be alone.

    Maybe there's something wrong with me.

    /endrant