September 22, 2012

• What I miss about high school

  I'm going on five years since I last was a high schooler. That's really freaky to think about. Really, really freaky. Sometimes it feels like just yesterday I was 18 years old, throwing caution to the wind, using indiscretion like it was going out of style and just being all around obnoxious. Those were really great times, and even though my mind is probably over-romanticizing the past like it usually does, there is one thing that is crystal clear.

  Back in high school, I had so many friends. I was in a program called IB. It was a pretty small group to begin with and there were maybe less than 80 kids by senior year. The thing is, I knew every single one of those people. First names, last names, general likes and dislikes, tendencies and vibes. We were all friends. Even with the stress of IB bearing down on us, we were still able to have so much fun. And maybe it was because of that stress we were able to grow closer to each other. 

  I don't know... high school just seemed more conducive to a certain type of friendship. It's hard to explain. I remember logging into aim, and just chatting with maybe 8 or more people at once. I remember having a list of about a dozen friends I could just call up on the phone and have nice long conversation with.

  College changed something. That list is probably down to 3 now, and no one uses aim or really chats anymore. Maybe facebook chat... but I never really used that like I did aim. It just seems like my circle of friends has gotten smaller and smaller throughout the years. This is in some part due to choice but not all of it. Some people I purposely isolated and others just disappeared. In the beginning of college I knew so many people, but then I decided to leave the world. I had my best friends, and I didn't need more. 

  In a lot of ways, that was a good thing. I had a lot more time for me, which I had been sorely missing, and I was able to focus a bit more on school and God. But the cons were evident as well. I may have kept my best friends, but that was it. Now, I spend most of my days going to school, to work and to sleep. It's a weird existence. 

  I'm starting to ramble now so I'll stop here. 

  I guess I just wanted to say that I miss high school. All the friends, all the conversations, and all the stupidness. 

  I miss being able to share my life with so many wonderful people at once. 

  Yeah, I miss that the most. 

  • 2:57 am
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